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Pananampalatayang may pagdududa (Kwentula) - Bro. Jose Cruz



John 14:9
Jesus answered: “Don’t you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’?

Sa mga Sandaling iyon bigla akong natigilan,,,
Gusto kong magkwento tungkol sa kanya,
Ang mga natamasa kong biyaya...
Gusto kong ibida dulot niyang kabutihan,
Ngunit sa diwa ay walang mamalas!
Kung bakit ang unang pumasok sa isip ko ay ang mga hindi kaibig-ibig para sa aking karanasan, dalawang taon matapos ng siya ay aming matagpuan, ako at nang aking pinsan, na kapwa bagong dating dito upang makipagsapalaran,
Kamangha-manghang maibubulalas,,,
Sa halip ay ang mga pighating sinapit,
Sa malayang pananampalataya ko pala ay nakakapit.

O baka naman sa akin talagala siya nakalaan,hmm..talaga namang masarap isipin sa ngayon ngunit aaminin kong hindi kagaya nuon,
Sa tabi ng garbage shoot ,sa tabi ng basurahan, kung bakit hindi pa siya tuluyang inihulog ay hindi ko alam, baka maharil sa taong ito ay may natitira paring paggalang sa Poong may lalang,

Biyaya bang maituturing ang trabahong madalas magdulot ng sama ng loob? Kapalit ng katawang sa gawain ay bugbog,
Hindi kagaya nuon, O kamahalang Poon,, nuong unang napasaamin ay hindi napagtuunan ng pansin, ni hindi napag-alayan ng panalangin, o bakit ngaba hindi??dahil ba sa pagiging abala o dahil sa walang inaasahang biyayang dala?,

Na sa halip na pagasenso ang napala ay mga sugat at kalyo?
Simula ng siya'y aming makita at makasama,
Marahil sa puntong iyon nga ay walang biyaya, wala dahil sa panahong iyon din ako halos mawalan ng pagasa, sa panahong iyon ko inasam na sanay mawala na, sa panahong iyon na sa srili'y lubusan pangang naawa.

Kaya't wala akong maibibidang biyaya na dulot niya, at ang tugon sa tanong kung saan ko siya nakuha ay hindi na hahaba,
Lalo't walang katunayang ako'y kanyang pinagpala,
Ang nagdulot sa puso ng saya,
Ngunit!, anu nga ba sa akin ang biyaya? Bakit ba kailangan ko pa ng pruwebang maipapakita,,
Bakit ba bigla ko nalang siyang pinaghanapan?
Matapos akong makaabot dito't mga pagsubok ay malagpasan?

Kung kaya't nahagip ng isipan ang karunungang nais ipabatid,
Matapos ng siya ay mapasaamin( mapasaakin)tila ito ang naging daan sa matibay kong pananalig,
Dahil ang tunay na biyaya ay ang Pananampatang siya ang naghatid,
Kung kaya't naging mapayapa ang pusong kadalasa'y maligalig,
Dahil ikaw ang Karunungan, ang Daan at ang Katotohanan. Amen.

Biyaya ng Pananampalataya, o ano't sa akin ngayo'y napakahalaga,
Biyaya ng Pananampalataya,
Biyaya ng Pananampalataya
Ang nag-alis ng lahat ng pangamba,
Ng dahil sa Biyaya ng Pananampalataya
-Ito ang napahabang sagot sa tanong kung saan ko siya nakuha.

Naalala ko, hindi ko makakalimutan ng una kong marinig na tinawag mo kong anak,
At ang isip ko'y nagliwanag,,, Nakasanayan ko narin na ang iyong mukha ay inaaninaw,
Ito ang parating sa puso ko'y pumupukaw,,,
Hayaan mo nalang na sa sarili ko ito mismo maranasan,
Kung nakalimutan ko kung paano mo ako iniligtas sa kasalanan,
Patuloy kitang hahanapin sa buhay na ito,

Dahil ikaw ang Karunungan, ang Daan at ang Katotohanan.
Amen.

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